He first received media attention in August when U. Ultimately, the couple ended their relationship, and Johnston and the Palin family engaged in several public feuds. After working in the Alaskan oil fieldsJohnston began pursuing a career in the entertainment industry, aspiring to be a model and an actor.
Now, with the mother of his pregnant girlfriend running for vice president, he had cut his mullet, shaved his peach fuzz, swapped his hockey sweater for a rep tie and an American flag pin, and manifested his love with a ring tattoo. Three years ago, I had a long argument with my intended. Having seen in Africa the effects of the world diamond cartel, I said I would buy her a ring with any stone she liked, as long as it was not a diamond.
Last night at a Fleshbot Awards party at the Box, a woman dressed as a woman-size vagina writhed onstage, and the former potential first son-in-law and soon-to-be Playgirl model Levi Johnston wriggled uncomfortably. Dressed in a suit and sandwiched between two very large men one of whom is his manager, TankMr. Johnston stood next to Playgirl editor Daniel Nardicio and prepared to accept his slightly premature Fleshbot award for Best Mainstream to Porn crossover.
Men in Alaska have the smallest widgets, coming in at 6. Following Washington DC, men in New York and California round out the top states with the largest penises, coming in with 7. Just ahead of Alaska, the smallest penises are found in Delaware and Wyoming with 6. I always thought the Washington Monument looked like a huge, erect pecker.
So very much like young goodlooking Don Johnson—Levi Johnston plays a new kind of Vic in this post-apocalyptic nightmare movie of the future. They hook Levi up to an artificial insemination machine that milks Levi constantly day and night. Both have sexual lust for women—but Dick plays coquettish and hard to get.
It probably isn't a coincidence that so many testosterone-drenched activities -- football, baseball, golf, bowling -- are described as "a game of inches. That's why we Asian guys collectively groaned when the persistent stereotype of the "underendowed" Asian male once again reared its petite but ugly head last month, as the scorned exes of boorish, disgraced half-Korean superdad Jon Gosselin unveiled their equivalent of the "nuclear option. Former Gosselin gal-pal Hailey Glassman dropped the first bomb just before Valentine's Day, when she announced to the vulture press that Gosselin's weenie is, well, teeny.
It gives us the sads to hear Levi Johnston is worried that he may not stack up well enough for his Playgirl shoot. Listen, us men all get stage fright. Shhh, baby.
I hate to be a dick, but why can't Playgirl nab any famous dudes who are, you know, actually hot to show off their stuff? Until recently, the biggest name to sign on to flash his family junk for the struggling nudie rag was Levi Johnston. After boasting about his workout regiment and stirring speculation that he'd be showing off his hockey stick full frontal-style, Sarah Palin 's grandbaby daddy was pudgy, flat-assed and hesitant to give away the goods.
After giving birth to a retard baby last year, her year-old mother claimed it as her own to avoid the scandal. She was then forced to have sex with an Eskimo to explain her long absence from school. Her pregnancy goes to show that Palin's abstinence-only sex education really works.