Sex is a topic that many people want to talk about — but few want to acknowledge if it becomes a problem. Many women face challenges in what is often the first step in sexual intimacy, which is sexual desire or sex drive. Women with low sex drive have reduced sexual interest and few sexual fantasies or thoughts.
When we do once, maybe twice a yearhe is interested, but it is me who initiates it. We have argued a lot about this because I feel our relationship has turned into a friendship. We do love each other and this is the only problem we have, but it has had a serious impact on my self-confidence.
One of my clients is a year-old man who has been in a relationship with his current girlfriend for about two years now. This is the longest time he has been with a partner — all his other relationships have lasted between only a few months and a year. His initial sexual attraction towards his girlfriends is usually very strong but after a while just disappears.
Ian Kerner is a licensed psychotherapist, certified sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author. Read more from him on his website, iankerner. In fact, low desire in one partner is probably the top reason couples seek out sex therapy.
Verified by Psychology Today. People normally differ in the degree of sexual appetite they have. There is no single standard of sexual desire, and desire differs not only from person to person but also for the same person over one's lifespan.
In long-term relationships, most couples find that their sexual desire for one another dwindles over time. In fact, it has been suggested that the initial surge of sexual desire only lasts around six to 18 months. Usually, when a couple first get together, the brain and body produce a complex cocktail of chemicals and reactions, which explains why new couples might experience a rush of excitement and a racing heart when they see each other and are so eager to get their clothes off.
Low sex drive in women has many potential causes, including underlying medical issues, emotional or psychological problems, or work- and family-related stress. The good news is that identifying the root cause of low libido can lead to effective treatment options. It is not unusual for couples to have a disparity in their sex drives.
Feelings of love can kill libido. Today's big relationship challenges—sexless marriages, low desire, infidelity, compulsive use of pornography, chronic conflict, and marital boredom— are all linked to this unfortunate reality. It's a basic dilemma for the contemporary man or woman.
In the new study, published today in BMJ Openresearchers surveyed more than 11, British men and women between the ages of 16 and 74, all of whom had at least one sexual partner in the past year. Half of those who lost interest in sex also said they were distressed about it. People who did not feel emotionally close to their partners—or who did not always find it easy to talk about sex with their partners—were also more likely to report a lack of interest in steaming up the sheets.
The low-libido partner may feel pushed and resentful, and the high-libido partner can feel abandoned, betrayed, rejected, and angry. While both individuals within this dynamic struggle, the higher-libido partner has unique challenges, and their perspective will be the focus of this post. Each type of couple has distinct difficulties. This partner feels they would not have willingly entered into a relationship where their sexual needs were not met, and they feel resentful and angry.